Follow Your Bliss (Bliss Series Book 2) Read online

  Joy froze when the doorknob turned. She rolled her shoulders to try and ease some of the tension and force herself to relax. It didn’t help.

  As soon as Mike walked in the door, he could tell she was upset. Her narrowed eyes and the tightness around her lips warned him that something was wrong.

  What the hell was her problem now? His thoughts began to race. Had she found out about the hot, young blonde he had met at the bar last week? He’d gotten her number, but they hadn’t gone out yet. There was no way she could know. He’d play it cool.

  “Bad day?” he asked.

  “You could say that,” she ground out. “We need to talk.”

  God, she’s so irrational and moody.

  Mike loosened his tie and sat down on the couch. He leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest. “What is it this time?” he asked irritably. He stared at her while he waited for her to start bitching. She was a beautiful woman. But she didn’t like being controlled. That was a big problem. If there was one thing, he couldn’t stand, it was an independent woman. He liked to keep his women under his thumb.

  Once they were married, things were going to change. He would show her who was in charge then. She could think she had the upper hand, but she was going to be in for a shock once she agreed to obey him.

  Joy thought he was an idiot, but he knew things she had no idea he knew. Like the fact, she sat on a pile of money. Soon it would be his. That’s the only reason why he hadn’t laid down the law yet. No other woman of his would get away with acting like such a bitch. He would put Joy in her place, and she would stay there. If she didn’t like it, then it would be more enjoyable for him.

  He’d let her have her say. Probably some stupid little thing at work had set her off. He wasn’t about to take the blame for it. She could have her little fit, he’d pretend to understand, and then things could go back to normal. Since she was acting like a bitch, he decided he’d call the blonde. They hadn’t had sex in over two weeks. For a woman who claimed to want a baby so bad, Joy didn’t like to put out. He was tired of her having the upper hand all the time.

  Mike’s thoughts strayed back to the blonde. Yeah, he’d call her. It wouldn’t take much to get her into his bed; she’d been flirtatious with him. She was young and had a body to die for. He bet she’d be wild in bed. She would probably do all the things he liked that Joy refused to do. Thoughts about what he’d do to Joy if she didn’t obey him had turned him on. He needed a release.

  “Are you even listening to me?” she snapped.

  “I’m all ears.” He looked at his watch. “Can you make it quick? I have an important business call to make.”

  “Guess who I ran into today?”

  So, it was going to be a stupid guessing game. Mike sighed. “I don’t know who?”

  “Denise, your ex-wife.”

  “Really?” he smirked. That was it then, a little fit of jealousy. Maybe this would work in his favor.

  “Yes, she’s pregnant.”

  “Oh, that’s surprising,” he laughed.

  “Why is that? Did you guys try to get pregnant when you were married?”

  “No, she never wanted kids. That’s why I’m surprised she’s having one now.”

  “I told her that right after we get married, we’re going to start trying for a baby.” He uncrossed his arms and shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “We talked for quite a while.”

  “You did? That’s odd.” His left eye started to twitch like it did when he lied to her.

  “I told her how I couldn’t wait to have a baby and that we were picking out baby names.” His gaze dropped from hers. He looked everywhere but at her. Guilty! “It’s true, isn’t it?” she snarled. “How could you do this to me?”

  Mike was an expert liar when he was prepared. But he had no warning, so she had thrown him off.

  “Honey, it’s not that bad.”

  Joy drew in a shaky breath as she clenched and unclenched her fists. She paced around the room, looking for something to throw at his lying face. “Not that bad?” she said through gritted teeth. “How in the hell can you say that?”

  “Calm down.”

  “No, I won’t fucking calm down. You were going to destroy my biggest dream. I can’t believe you.” Her voice grew louder. “You know how much being a mother means to me. I poured my heart out to you about it.”

  “Come on, sweetheart. You’re too old to be having a baby anyway.”

  “Too old? I’m only twenty-eight,” she spat.

  “Exactly. If you’re going to have children, you need to start young. You’ll be an old mother. Who wants that? It’s not good for you or a child. No child wants an old mom.”

  His words were echoes of her thoughts. She had put off motherhood as long as she felt she could. It was now or never. It didn’t help her anxiety to hear him voice his opinion. Of course, he knew that.

  “Some women don’t start families until they’re in their forties.”

  He sighed heavily and gave her a look of pity. “I feel sorry for you, honey. That ship has sailed. Why can’t you be happy with us and what we have?”

  “What we have?” she hissed. “You were willing to start our marriage out based on a lie.”

  “I was trying to spare you the shame. Your desperation is a sad thing."

  “So, you planned to make me feel like a failure—like if I couldn’t conceive it was my fault? Just like you did to Denise.”

  “I like what we have. I’m too selfish to have kids.” At least he was honest about his selfishness. He went in for the kill. “Besides honey, you are pushing it with your weight. You’re a little, too,” he paused as he looked for a word. “Chun—er curvy. Pregnancy would ruin what little shape you do have.”

  “Some men like curvy women,” she lashed out.

  “Trust me; no man will want you after you have a baby. You’ll lose what little figure you still have. You’ll end up with wide hips, saggy breasts, and stretch marks. And, on top of that, you’ll be old. What will you have to offer a man?”

  Joy turned her head before he could see the tears in her eyes. She blinked to keep them from falling. Hold onto the anger. “All men don’t think like you,” she whispered.

  Mike knew how insecure she could be. He used her insecurities against her.

  Chapter Four

  “I’ll have a baby on my own then.”

  “Of course, you will. A man won’t stick around when there are so many other young women available that are in shape. You’ll sit on your fat ass with a baby attached to your swollen tits. Meanwhile, your man will be fucking a hot young woman. But you’ll be happy. Won’t you?” he sneered.

  She almost hated him now. What did I ever see in him? “I’ll lose weight and get back into shape once the baby is born.”

  “Now, be reasonable,” he smirked. “We both know that you’ve struggled with twenty pounds. You haven’t even been able to lose that little amount. You know you have a problem with food. Given free rein, you’ll chunk out, and you’ll be stuck with even more weight.”

  “So, you think I’m fat? Is that it?”

  “Not exactly. I’ve been hesitant to say anything. You seem to eat more when you have your little issues.”

  Yes, she ate when she was stressed. She’d packed on twenty pounds since she had started to date Mike. That should have warned her about the state of their relationship.

  “How about we put you on a diet? If you can manage to lose twenty pounds, I’ll get you a little dog. It’ll be killing two birds with one stone. You’ll have solved the weight problem and the mother issue.”

  “I don’t want a dog! I want a baby!”

  “Honey, you can’t have everything. Be happy with what you can get.”

  “Get out!” she screamed.

  He looked startled. “Now, Joy—"

  “I mean it! Get out! I’m done with you.”

  “You’ll regret this. You’re lucky you still have me.”

  “I’ll take my chances alo
ne. Now, get the hell out before I hurt you.”

  “Watch what you say, sweetheart. There are plenty of women out there.”

  “Good, go find one.”

  “You’re overreacting here. We’ll discuss this further after you’ve calmed down and gotten yourself under control.” He opened the door and slammed it on his way out.

  She was too angry to cry. Mike hadn’t said anything that wasn’t already playing in her head. Her weight did bother her. Mike wasn’t a big man. He was only 5’ 8” and 160 pounds.

  Next to him, she might look big. A muscular guy would make her look tiny. At least that’s what she told herself. But a muscular guy would be worse. Those types of men were always in love with themselves. They wouldn’t want her anyway. They seemed to always go for tall, thin, anorexic looking supermodels. Joy could never pass as anorexic, or a model. She had too many curves. Anyway, she was done with men!

  How could life change so much in less than ten hours? When she woke up that morning, she knew what path she was on and where life was taking her. Now, she was alone and angry. If she was honest with herself, she had known something was wrong. This relationship hadn’t felt right to her. She wanted to be a mother before she turned thirty. Wanting a baby had made her blind to how bad things had gotten between them. She’d been willing to settle for her dream to come true. That must be what caused her lapse in judgment.

  Looking back now, she realized they didn’t even get along most of the time. They fought a lot about her going out and enjoying time with her friends. She loved to hang out with her friends and tried to get together with them at least a couple of times a month.

  Once a year she would meet up with some of her college friends for a weekend. Mike always made a big ordeal out of it. He was jealous of everything she did. She wasn’t sure why he even wanted to be with her. He had no trust in her and always checked up on her.

  They hadn’t had sex in over two weeks; it hadn’t bothered her a bit. The sex had never been that great anyway. How could I have been so clueless? So blind to his true nature?

  Mike had been charming at first. She had fallen for his act. Slowly, his true colors had started to show. She would never fall for a charming act again. Their relationship was over; there was no saving it. She needed to pick up the pieces and move on. She never allowed herself to wallow in self-pity for too long.

  Joy slept in the spare bedroom with the door locked. He could sleep alone. She would never get into bed with that lying bastard ever again.

  Mike knocked on the bedroom door when he came home. “Open up the damn door. You're acting ridiculous. I thought you’d be done pouting by now. I’m leaving for New York in the morning. I’ll be gone for three days.” He pounded on the door again. She ignored him. He finally gave up. “Fine—be a bitch,” he yelled.

  He’d been shot down by the blonde. His plan was to sweet talk Joy into bed when he got home. Figures she’d still be acting like a bitch. He’d call up one of his exes when he got to New York. He needed sex. If the bitch wouldn’t put out, he’d get it somewhere else.

  Now he couldn’t wait to marry Joy. While he was gone, she would come to her senses and realize what she would lose. He went to bed and thought of all the ways she was going to pay once she said the words: I do. She’d be sorry and beg him then. He would teach her a few lessons on who was in charge and make her pay for her behavior. Mike smiled as he pictured her on her knees, begging him. And while she was there.

  The next morning, he knocked on the door again. Joy ignored him. “I’ll see you when I get home. You can make it up to me then.”

  Make it up to him? Joy flipped him off through the door. She wouldn’t make up anything to him, and he wouldn’t see her either. The idiot thought she couldn’t survive without him. She’d show him. The apartment was in his name. That was one less thing to worry about.

  Three days would give her time to pack and leave. Mike was insane if he thought she’d stay with him after all of this.

  Joy heard the front door shut. She walked into the bathroom and looked around at the mess he’d left. A pile of wet towels lay on the floor. The sink was full of whiskers from his morning shave. Toothpaste had hardened on the counter and faucet where he’d spit. She wasn’t surprised that he hadn’t picked up after himself. He expected her to clean up after him. Not today—not anymore.

  Joy yawned as she walked into the kitchen to make a cup of coffee. Mike had slopped coffee all over the side of a mug. A dark ring formed on the counter where the half-empty mug sat. He had spilled sugar on the counter as well as the floor. The sugar bowl was empty. She took the round blue container out of the cupboard and filled up the bowl. When it rains, it pours. The counter was littered with toast crumbs as well. She resisted the urge to sweep up. Maybe ants would move in before he returned home.

  She made a cup of coffee and walked into the living room. Ugh! Dirty socks. Joy hated when he left his dirty socks wherever he took them off. She sat her cup on a coaster and picked up his socks with her fingertips. There was a pair in the hallway as well. She threw them into the washing machine along with his white dress shirts she had pulled off the hangers in the closet. She opened a new package of t-shirts that were on the dresser. Red? What will it hurt? She shrugged as she tossed them into the machine, turned the temperature to hot, and started the washer.

  Back in the kitchen, she noticed a shirt on the table. There was a note with it. ‘Joy fix this! I need it for that important business meeting on Friday.’ A couple of buttons were missing. What was that smell? She picked up the shirt and held it to her nose. That wasn’t her perfume. Joy clenched the shirt in her fist and gritted her teeth. She stalked into the bedroom and got out a needle and thread. She pulled every pair of his dress slacks out of the closet. Might as well get out her sewing machine and do some hemming. When she’d finished, she looked at the alarm clock, smiled, and set it back an hour.

  Joy drove to the store to get some boxes, so she could start to pack. She already had a storage unit that contained her furniture. She’d moved into Mike’s apartment the year before, and there hadn’t been room for her things. It turned out to be a blessing in disguise. There was less to move that way. When she returned, she took one of the moving boxes into the bedroom. She threw every left shoe he had into it, closed the top, and wrote cleaning supplies on the side. She put the box in the utility closet. The washing machine stopped. His pink clothes went into the dryer.

  Chapter Five

  Mike called her repeatedly from New York. His plan to hook up with an ex didn’t pan out. He also wasted two hours buying drinks for a woman at the hotel bar. She had been waiting for her boyfriend and ditched him as soon as he arrived.

  He grew angrier with each call Joy didn’t answer. Joy let all his calls go to voicemail. She had nothing to say to him. His messages started out being sweet. He begged her to call him back, saying he loved her, and they could work things out. Soon, they turned into threats. She could tell he was drunk. He would have to move on like he said he would. She no longer wanted anything to do with him.

  Joy spent the next day and a half packing. It didn’t take very long. She left a lot of things behind. It would be easier to replace them. All she had were clothes and her grandmother’s quilt. As soon as she finished packing, she loaded her car up with the boxes. She left her key and engagement ring on the table. Joy breathed a sigh of relief as she walked out the door for the very last time.

  Joy drove to her storage unit. The place was a mess. Mike had done a half-assed job when he helped her move her things there. It was like he’d just thrown the boxes everywhere and left. She was rearranging boxes when one fell from the top stack. It ripped open, and papers flew everywhere. She much for a quick job. Joy walked to the dumpster to see if she could find another box. She found a clean one on top, grabbed it, and walked back to her storage unit. She knelt and started to pick up the papers. They were mostly old letters from college. She should probably toss them. The last envelope she picke
d up had GOALS written on the front. Joy opened it and read it. Her heart sank. Only five goals and she hadn’t accomplished one thing.

  List of things to do by 30

  Move out of the city.

  Own my own house.

  Run my own business.

  Have a meaningless fling with a hot guy. Find out what it’s all about!!!

  Have a baby.

  Joy closed the box and placed it on a short stack of boxes. Having accomplished nothing on the list was more depressing than her break-up. What have I done with my life?

  She walked to her car with the list gripped in her hand and a determined look on her face. I’m going to do everything on this list if it kills me. She wasn’t sure what she’d thought when she wrote # 4. But, damn it—she was doing it! The first hot guy she saw wasn’t going to know what hit him. She was 28 and whatever ‘it was all about’ she hadn’t yet discovered.

  Joy drove across town and rented a hotel room. She never wanted to see Mike again. If she stayed here, she would more than likely run into him. She needed to look for a place in another town.

  Mike was due home later that night. She knew he would call as soon as he got there. Her phone rang at 7:00 p.m. She let the call go to voicemail and then checked the message. “Joy, it’s over between us,” he yelled. She rolled her eyes. Like I need him to tell me that. “Don’t come crawling back to me when you realize what a mistake you made.” As if that’s going to happen. “Don’t think I don’t have someone else lined up. You’ll be alone, but I’ll have someone by the end of the week.” She didn’t doubt that for a minute. No matter how big the loser was, there was always a woman willing to take your place. She felt sorry for whoever ended up with him. Joy yawned and stretched out on the bed. She would hear from him the next day.

  The next morning her cell phone rang. She looked at it, smiled, and answered. “Good morning, sunshine.”